OT: Troll Rankings- Off-Season edition.
by Dr Pepper on Nov 10, 2008 12:22 AM CST
Email
PrintThe GM meetings have passed and not a damn thing happened. Check that, the Rangers signed the great Pedro Strop. This week needs to get off to a rocking start and I will make that happen because- Back by popular demand....It's the Troll Rankings! You know the drill-
Lbrooks: Really tired of your shtick man.
Clueless: See Lbrooks
Steal home/Save us etc: Just don't reply. He's what, eleven? Let him be, just like white girls he just wants attention.
OC: Brought some funny to the board the other day...... That was a good, then you completely offset it by acting like your girl told you that you didn't measure up or something.... Cheer up man! Extenze works. Not that I would know or anything.
Brettgardner: Defending champ.
Josey Wales: See Clueless.
Longhorn: On here for.... being Longhorn? I don't know.
Sharky: We all know what Sharky is capable of doing and this election brought out the best in him... But he took his trolliness to a whole notha leva when he said that he was planning to welch ab03 all along. Troll+Cheapskate= Sharky wearing Roca Pads.
TheAhmad: Where have you been? I want to know how you would handle this off-season.
HurlerHurley: Well, that didn't last long did it? He's back to his drunk self and back on the list. What is it with Highland Park folk always being followed around by the "Ants Marching" song?
AirJordan: Just polluted a playoff GDT with terrible terrible jokes. And not one Yo Mama joke. I'll be expecting you to use this the next time you do this- Drum roll please..... Yo Mama so fat she's got more chins than a Chinese phone book. Yep, that's one awful Yo Mama joke. But you know you're gonna say it to all your friends.
4him: Get a life. Religion talk? Really? Nobody cares about your close minded viewpoints.
Miles: So the young one went off to school and virtually ceased to post here. The curse however, is still going strong. I haven't given up on him though, his trolling ceiling is so high that we'll attribute the first year dip in performance to him just balancing college and sex with LSB. If his trolliness does not come back next year, there is cause for concern.
Benmor78: Nuff said.
Agreen07: Ala Miles, he's been pretty quiet lately.
Lonestarjohn: What were you thinking? How would you like it if I made sweet sweet love to Salty behind your back? Don't you ever post a troll relating fanpost again. Capiche?
Dr Pepper.
-------------------------------------------------------------
The WTF award goes to Rodney. You gave Lonestarjohn a free I-pod? Dude, What the f***!
Disclaimer: This is not a personal attack against anyone on here.
75 comments
|
5 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
Hmm...
I’m the only candidate with admin privileges.
"I know you're a bit dense but no, it doesn't. Obviously lying isn't a problem for me."
To be fair, we should probably add all the dips that "+1" everything, add no substance, and worry about other people's dick size and emotions to this list.
GREINKE HO!!!!!
by oc on Nov 10, 2008 12:50 AM CST up reply actions 1 recs
It's okay, Oliver. You don't have to dance around it. You can call me out by name.
The 40 Trumps All!!!
Rule 5? No…talk to the hand.
by thedirkatron on Nov 10, 2008 2:17 AM CST up reply actions
+1
I won’t take my ball and go home. I’ll play along.
"He’s basically told himself unconsciously that he can’t be any good unless he catches 130 games a year. If he played with the baseball smarts of a guy like a David Eckstein, he’d maximize his talent and be an incredible player." - Andy Seiler, Texas Rangers Analyst
by inactive lsb user on Nov 10, 2008 5:26 AM CST up reply actions
Sir lighten up.
Disclaimer: This is not a personal attack against anyone on here.
If that didn’t make you feel better how about a smiley face :). Everybody loves a good smiley face.
heh
doesn’t seem prudent
""If they'd have told me you can make the team but you've got to shine the shoes, I'd have been there shining shoes." -Bradley
That's what I was thinking.
"I know you're a bit dense but no, it doesn't. Obviously lying isn't a problem for me."
Nobody cares?
Really? One wouldn’t assume that by many of the questions that I get on here.
I’m close-minded? Really? Can you articulate in what way? The irony is, many of the posters here fit that description b/c they are intolerant of the beliefs and opinions of Christians. And you simply prove the point with your words here.
I'm a Christian Too
BUT, I think you should just let it slide and move on…don’t get overly defensive and cause an argument that the board doesn’t need. Message boards are not the best place to have conversations about these types of topics, so just move on and post about baseball.
Rangeressary
"the poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese." - G.K. Chesterton
by rangeressary on Nov 10, 2008 5:18 AM CST up reply actions
Message boards are not the best place to have conversations about these types of topics, so just move on and post about baseball.
exactly (from another Christian)
normal people : chuck norris :: getting flustered in big games : greg davis
by knockoutking on Nov 10, 2008 11:10 AM CST up reply actions
If people ask you questions
about Christianity, even on a message board, you’re not going to give them a reason for the hope that is in you?
is that what you've been trying to do?
because you’re not doing a good job of it.
""If they'd have told me you can make the team but you've got to shine the shoes, I'd have been there shining shoes." -Bradley
no i'm not
""If they'd have told me you can make the team but you've got to shine the shoes, I'd have been there shining shoes." -Bradley
I Answer Questions
To be honest though, I’d rather refer people to books or articles where their questions are discussed in a fuller manner than is possible on a message board. I’ve had plenty of e-mail discussions with posters from LSB and the old ESPN Boards over the years as well. I’ve even hung out with a few in person and we’ve discussed our faiths with each other.
I just don’t think a forum such as this gives itself to well reasoned, thorough answers. Usually these discussions only give way to denouncing rhetoric on both sides of the topic, which isn’t beneficial and IMO betrays the spirit of Christ.
With that said, I also don’t like being a religious moderator on these boards either, so I’ll leave y’all to continue the discussion on your own. As for me, I’m going back to reading about baseball…which is why I came to the ESPN boards a decade ago, and why I read LSB today.
Rangeressary
"the poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese." - G.K. Chesterton
by rangeressary on Nov 10, 2008 11:34 PM CST up reply actions 2 recs
Seriously, what the hell do I have to do to get on one of these troll rankings lists???
I’m a huge jerk to everyone on here and I hate the living shit out of that replacement player piece of garbage you all refer to as David Murphy.
This sucks.
The 40 Trumps All!!!
Rule 5? No…talk to the hand.
Yeah you trying too hard
you’re either a troll or not a troll. It’s in your DNA. You clearly aren’t a troll…deal with it!
"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005
Timmy Timinson was a mild-mannered student.
But his life changed completely after a fateful visit to a research lab, where he was bitten by a genetically-modified, radioactive troll. The troll saliva bonded with his DNA, and Timmy developed an irrepressible desire to go online and compare other mild-mannered posters to Adolf Hitler. In time, he learned to harness his troll powers for Evil, and became the Tremendous Troll.
However, one night his beloved uncle Ted got excited discussing race with Timmy, and received a coronary. From this traumatic experience Timmy learned that with great vitriol, must come great irresponsibility. Thereafter, Timmy tremulously tore through ten thousand tee-ball discussion boards.
"It's just a tiny little nick, but it hurts when I get champagne in there."
- Jason Bay, on getting spiked scoring the winning run in ALDS Game Four.
When will the D-Bag rankings go up?
I know Brian Thomas is the hands down winner.
"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005
Snap
Those who would sacrifice liberty for safety deserve neither.
by Brian Thomas on Nov 10, 2008 1:43 PM CST up reply actions
Who is this 4him character?
Seriously nobody can stand a n00b troll. Get established, post some quality comments and eventually maybe you’ll become a troll. Until that day comes, nobody will respect you…not even top trolls. You can prematurely troll but you’ll end up in bed alone wondering what you have to do to get the admiration and approval of top trolls.
And maybe if you’re lucky, one day you can join the coup that is Miles, LAmusclefag, Longhorn and myself. We took this site over for a few days a while back…but don’t worry, we’ll be back.
"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005
That's a very interesting theory.
I hope you don’t mind if I expand…
The Agreen07 Troll Theory states that in order to successfully become an LSB troll, one must satisfy ALL of the following conditions.
1) Establish yourself as a legitimate commenter by posting a minimum of ten (10) insightful and/or interesting comments related to the Rangers.
2) Develop at least one shtick (examples include religion, firing the general manager, hatred of all things LSB, injection of politics into non-politics threads, one-word responses, etc.)
3) Maintain an 5/1 ratio of shtick to non-shtick comments.
4) Be a jerk to anyone who disagrees with you, and remain staunchly unshakable from your beliefs, regardless of logical responses presented to you.
By virtue of this theory I’d argue that Longhorn, miles, lonestarjon, benmor and brettgardner are not trolls, and I request that they be removed from voting.
"One man, five scoops." -- shroomer
by ghtd36 on Nov 10, 2008 9:42 AM CST up reply actions 6 recs
Brilliance
Although I think you should add AirJordan to that list too (of people to be taken off).
Just say no to Scott Olsen.
that's a compelling argument sir..
X
I couldn’t agree with you more.
Steal Home R.I.P. 9/10/08
by LAMuscleFag on Nov 10, 2008 12:04 PM CST up reply actions
I actually wasnt planning to welch ab all along
The original $100 bet, I considered paying. Then very late I decided to welch. But then since I figured I was welching anway, I might as well try for a double or nothing in case it worked.
Either/Or
American Heritage Dictionary
Pronunciation Key (wělsh, wělch)
intr.v. welshed also welched, welsh·ing also welch·ing, welsh·es also welch·es Informal
1. To swindle a person by not paying a debt or wager.
2. To fail to fulfill an obligation.
3. See also; Sharky
"...my balls are really like a veiny flesh color" blueballlefty on Jun 4, 2008 7:44 PM EDT
"you gonna lose your horse. seriously." FX2
Yes we can! November 04, 2008
had no idea that term was a racial slur
""If they'd have told me you can make the team but you've got to shine the shoes, I'd have been there shining shoes." -Bradley
I wonder
why people say that ‘gypped’ is a bad racial slur, when there really aren’t gypsies around, but say nothing about ‘welch,’ when there are actual Welsh people around.
Because the Welsh just haven't done much
They’re like Canadians.
By 2028, Mark Teixeira will be in the HOF.
-The Outlaw
Irish Travellers are around the US and are IMO gypsies.
They’re notorious for their scams. See the tv series “The Riches”
Signature! I don't need no stinking signature!!
by DerekSTheRed on Nov 10, 2008 9:37 AM CST up reply actions
Actually
There’s a pretty large gypsy population in Eastern Europe and the former Soviet countries. You run into them occasionally while traveling Western Europe as well (particularly in Spain).
Rangeressary
"the poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese." - G.K. Chesterton
by rangeressary on Nov 10, 2008 10:20 AM CST up reply actions
well there are gypsies
but i had the same sentiment. Am I pissing off my (theoretical) Welsh friends when I tell them that Sharky welched on my bet?
""If they'd have told me you can make the team but you've got to shine the shoes, I'd have been there shining shoes." -Bradley
Hi I'm black Francis
I think abortion is cool, but welching on a message board bet between strangers, I draw the line there!
Wait a Minute
I have never in my life said or thought that abortion is cool.
Welshing on that bet does say something about your character, no matter what you think.
by Black Francis on Nov 10, 2008 5:18 PM CST up reply actions
Congratulations, you just tried to make a reasoned response to Sharky.
The 40 Trumps All!!!
Rule 5? No…talk to the hand.
by thedirkatron on Nov 10, 2008 8:22 PM CST up reply actions
i like this explanation
is it supposed to make us think more highly or less highly of you?
""If they'd have told me you can make the team but you've got to shine the shoes, I'd have been there shining shoes." -Bradley
Autovote here
Has to go to Steal home.
I will say though serious consideration for second place should be given to “the oc” who as mentioned above has been pretty bitchy lately (while ironically telling everyone else that we should clean some sand out of our panties at the same time). Nothing personal toward him, but that bit is wearing thin.
by JimBonnick84 on Nov 10, 2008 8:30 AM CST reply actions 1 recs
Dr. Pepper
Keep preachin’ the good word.
I am the motherfucking shore patrol, motherfucker! I am the motherfucking shore patrol! Give this man a beer.
dumb
all a troll really wants is attention. and instead of ignoring them so they go away, we post threads exhaulting them.
and several of the listed “trolls” on this list aren’t trolls, i think they are more like flamers, who have been mostly upset arguers with the recent election cycle…
"Anyone that isn't pro-choice never met you" ~Brian Thomas on Seth...
Well
I agree several people on there don’t belong, but I don’t think anyone is getting their feelings hurt. And since it’s been rather slow in Rangers’ news, the political threads have been the center of LSB controversy. Naturally, a few names appear from those threads.
I am the motherfucking shore patrol, motherfucker! I am the motherfucking shore patrol! Give this man a beer.
It's gypped
Dammit!
:)
"...my balls are really like a veiny flesh color" blueballlefty on Jun 4, 2008 7:44 PM EDT
"you gonna lose your horse. seriously." FX2
Yes we can! November 04, 2008
Thanks for the vote, Rodney.
Would you have still voted for me if I had agreed to meet you after your beyond creepy pm?
"Dying ain't hard. It's living that's hard."
by Josey Wales on Nov 10, 2008 11:53 PM CST up reply actions
Speaking of "tired schtick"...
the “Troll Poll” redefines the category.
Can I write-in Dr. Pepper?
Never mind….who cares?
Smile when you call me Beat Weed!
+1
I guess we gotta take it one week at a time, with Olly …
"He’s basically told himself unconsciously that he can’t be any good unless he catches 130 games a year. If he played with the baseball smarts of a guy like a David Eckstein, he’d maximize his talent and be an incredible player." - Andy Seiler, Texas Rangers Analyst
by inactive lsb user on Nov 11, 2008 8:47 AM CST up reply actions
lol
greatness
I'm undefeated in fights. Have I been in any? No. Thats because people know my f'ing status. Don't mess with the elite. - Miles
by Dirk Diggler on Nov 10, 2008 9:31 PM CST up reply actions
??
I don’t get it. I hope I’m not the only one….
It's baseball. You don't always get what you want, and you don't always want what you get. --Ed Coffin
looks like a rave
for 7 year olds
Nolan Ryan is the Greatest Pitcher ever, because Google says so.
"BTW I’m officially welching ab03. Yeah I planned too all along, but I figured I’d try to get off the hook with double or nothing first."- Sharky
LMAO
pictures are worth a thousand words, this one is worth a million! :)
"It ain't braggin' if you can back it up."
-Dizzy Dean
by thegashousegang on Nov 11, 2008 9:25 AM CST up reply actions
This Troll nomination has benefits...
It’ll get me off the invitation list for your weekly JD Circle jerks.
Smile when you call me Beat Weed!
by Clueless on Nov 11, 2008 12:44 PM CST reply actions 1 recs
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
User Tools
Related FanPosts on Lone Star Ball
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
Recommended FanPosts
Recent FanPosts
In Association With
Big League Stew - MLB - Yahoo! Sports
- The Citi Field All-Star game has finally been made official for 2013
- Brett Lawrie receives four-game suspension, fined for ‘aggressive actions’ toward umpire
- PNC Park security guard loses finger in struggle with fan during Pirates game
- Create-a-Caption: Partying like it’s 1988
- The Ron Washington puppet is watching you while you sleep — and has possibly jinxed the Rangers
