New feature -- What does this guy look like?
by Adam J. Morris on Apr 17, 2008 11:15 AM CDT
58 comments
Something new I'm going to do here...take the Yahoo sports photo of a player on the opposing team from today's game, put it up, and ask everyone here...
What does this guy look like? If he weren't a baseball player, just based on how he looks in this picture, what do you think he'd be doing?
To start off...we have Toronto's Scott Downs:
via l.yimg.com
I'm thinking a tow truck driver, or maybe a clerk at one of those MegapleXXX Video Stores you see on I-35 and I-45.
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"Would you like frys with that?"
“No, I’m sorry sir, there isn’t a size larger than our Biggie size”
Ya....That's Real Mature.
by SMITTY on Apr 17, 2008 11:22 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
hmmm
A special guest character on King of the Hill.
But that river of tears has dried for all of us.
by trza on Apr 17, 2008 11:26 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
My first thought was Jeff Brantley...
...which is unfortunate for Mr. Downs since JB is such a douche.
Right around the time all the young talent is ready to contend is when the organization will realize that Ron Washington is the wrong man for the job.
by Chad Crudup on Apr 17, 2008 11:26 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
looks like a dock worker
something where he’s wearing a flannel over a gray hoodie
scap load or die
by ab03 on Apr 17, 2008 11:29 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Roto-Rooter Plumber
"Hmn [sic] ... pehaps [sic] I've said too much..." - LSJesus
by Chase Irwin on Apr 17, 2008 11:29 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
scott downs
I don’t think I could say he looks like one of the clerks at the MegapleXXX Video Stores since I have never been in one of those stores. So, I have to take you at your word and your experience AJM. :)
yo soy Horsedooty!
I soloed in the mile high club.
by Sr Horsedooty on Apr 17, 2008 11:29 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Hola
“yo soy Horsedooty” is redundant.
“soy Horsedooty” would be sufficient, as the “yo” is implied.
by CSquyres on Apr 17, 2008 11:42 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
¡Vámonos!
"Hmn [sic] ... pehaps [sic] I've said too much..." - LSJesus
by Chase Irwin on Apr 17, 2008 11:59 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
hola
it is the more formal variation I am aware of the implied thanks
yo soy Horsedooty!
I soloed in the mile high club.
by Sr Horsedooty on Apr 17, 2008 2:59 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Mario Lemueax
Formerly known as OKRangerFan
by B_Black on Apr 17, 2008 11:32 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Pro bass fisherman
or Mark Portugal’s cousin
by SteveP on Apr 17, 2008 11:36 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Downs.
Some form of management at a country-western bar.
by CSquyres on Apr 17, 2008 11:45 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
waiter at Chili's
can I get an Awesome Blossom?
Greatest Inventions Ever? 1. TiVO, 2. Boobs, 3. Baseball
by willamos2 on Apr 17, 2008 11:47 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Bail Bondsman
a watered down Dawg Chapman.
Being a Rangers fan is like having a 36 year old retarded son. It would be best if you don't have depressive or substance abuse tendencies otherwise you'd better find another team.
by LAMuscleFag on Apr 17, 2008 11:48 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
He looks a bit like
a guy I got sent out for a few days with to try to sell meat door-to-door from a freezer in the back of a truck. He was a chain-smoker, drove a slightly overloaded Toyota Tacoma at 95 miles an hour, was selling the meat door-to-door to get out of paying child support, made me hit up every beauty salon in Tulare, Calif. and whenever someone bought some meat and paid with a check, had them make the check out to me because I had two forms of ID, so I could cash the check, since having the check written to the company meant a big chunk of it would be taken out as a “fee.” Then for all the crap I went through, he gave me $20 and kept the rest of the money we made that day.
downs has longer, darker hair, but similar facial features.
by Inkara1 on Apr 17, 2008 11:48 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
A mustache away from being a really cool looking player....
in the 70s.
by rooster on Apr 17, 2008 11:58 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Well, his job definitely involves a name tag of some sort
Probabaly one of those sewed on name patches. And his name is either Ricky or Darryl or Wade (it is actually Ricky Joe or Darryl Lee, but the name patch only has so much space).
I would say Jiffy Lube “technician,” but that’s too obvious. I’m gonna go with plumber’s helper. He’s the guy that carries the wrenches/digs the trenches.
All the unionized plumbers have determined that he’s not really real plumber material, and they mock him incessantly for it. “Hey Darrell (I’m changing the spelling b/c Darrell’s parents wouldn’t have any sissified “Y” in the spelling of their son’s name [What’s that French or sumpin??]), I forgit, which direction does water flow, up, down, or side to side?” hee haw hee!
And when he says shit fire, and dareel says shit fire alot, it is sort of his catchphrase, each words comes out at 4 syllables.
Rex Hudler is in demand as a motivational speaker.
by Brian Thomas on Apr 17, 2008 11:58 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Wasn't he a bouncer?
in Roadhouse?
"But the major difference is where Showalter tried to overthink everything Washington at times seems like he isn't thinking at all. " - rentz
by hillcrest on Apr 17, 2008 12:22 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Geez, Adam
...maybe a clerk at one of those MegapleXXX Video Stores you see on I-35 and I-45.
You could at least try to be discreet.
Anyway, the guy in the picture works in my post office. “Do you want to send that certified?”
by Lucas on Apr 17, 2008 12:23 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Police officer.
The kind of guy with an itchy trigger finger on his taser.
LSB 2.0 confuses and scares me.
by ghtd36 on Apr 17, 2008 12:27 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Beer Truck Driver
or Sparkletts water delivery person
with a barrel chest, short sleeve button down shirt, and shorts.
by bhudson on Apr 17, 2008 12:42 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I may be tossing myself into scalding hot water here...
and I’ve only seen one or two photos of you…but Adam, don’t you get the feeling he looks strikingly familiar to the same view you see in the mirror every day?
I could be wrong here…
"No, Donny, these men are nihilists, there's nothing to be afraid of."
by Walter Sobchak on Apr 17, 2008 12:43 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
In all fairness
We should all post our own pictures and have everyone else say what we look like…as for Mr. Downs, I’m thinking Beau bridges fat drunken cousin.
Whatever gets you through the night, 'salright, 'salright.
by t ball on Apr 17, 2008 12:44 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
That's what I look like
And with the 22nd overall selection the Dallas Cowboys select Jonathan Stewart.
by TheBZA on Apr 17, 2008 12:56 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Magglio Ordonez on a really bad day
And with the 22nd overall selection the Dallas Cowboys select Jonathan Stewart.
by TheBZA on Apr 17, 2008 12:56 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Business in the front...
party in the back!
There is no such thing as global warming. David Murphy was cold, so he turned the sun up.
by SarasotaRanger on Apr 17, 2008 1:11 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I just shaved off my mullet
never had one before, now I’ve got brad pitt hair
"No, Donny, these men are nihilists, there's nothing to be afraid of."
by Walter Sobchak on Apr 17, 2008 6:48 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Body Double?
He looks like he could be the stand-in for Paul Rudd’s character, Brian Fantana, in the movie Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy.
by baylor on Apr 17, 2008 1:22 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Installer
of storm windows, awnings, and other home improvements you pay three times the value price for, have no useful warranty, fail in the first storm, and who uses a “trade name” so he can’t be traced for compensation for damages to your property.
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
by Ed Coffin on Apr 17, 2008 1:23 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Jizz mopper at the MegapleXXX Video Store,
But thats just a guess.
Adam loves him some Lard
by NYTXFAN on Apr 17, 2008 1:33 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
hahaha ...no he didn't!
Yes he did!
Being a Rangers fan is like having a 36 year old retarded son. It would be best if you don't have depressive or substance abuse tendencies otherwise you'd better find another team.
by LAMuscleFag on Apr 17, 2008 1:49 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
A little lewd, I know, but I just gotta.
Dante Hicks: You ever notice how all the prices end in nine? Damn, that’s eerie.
Randal Graves: [reading a magazine] Have you ever wondered how much the average jizz-mopper makes per hour?
Dante Hicks: What’s a jizz-mopper?
Randal Graves: He’s the guy that cleans up the nudie booth after each guy jerks off.
Dante Hicks: Nudie booth?
Randal Graves: Yeah, nudie booth. You’ve never been in a nudie booth?
Dante Hicks: I guess not.
Randal Graves: Oh, it’s great. There’s this glass between you and these chicks, and they put on a show for you for like 10 bucks.
Dante Hicks: What kinda show?
[Customer walks up to counter with a bottle of glass cleaner and a roll of paper towels]
Randal Graves: They do the weirdest, craziest shit you like to see chicks do. They insert things into any opening on their body – ANY opening.
Dante Hicks: Could we not talk about this right now?
Randal Graves: The jizz-mopper’s job is to clean off the glass after each guy shoots a load. I don’t know if you noticed, but cum leaves streaks if you don’t clean it right away.
Offended Customer: I will never come to this place again!
Dante Hicks: I’m sorry?
Offended Customer: Using filthy language in front of the customers, you both should be fired!
Dante Hicks: I’m sorry, I guess we got carried away.
Offended Customer: I don’t know if sorry could make up for it, you’ve highly offended me.
Randal Graves: Well if you thinks that’s offensive, check this out!
[Shows him graphic picture from porn mag]
Randal Graves: I think you can see her kidneys!
One of my favorite movies.
LSB 2.0 confuses and scares me.
by ghtd36 on Apr 17, 2008 2:04 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Clerks is funny....
... but jeez man.
There is no such thing as global warming. David Murphy was cold, so he turned the sun up.
by SarasotaRanger on Apr 17, 2008 2:06 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
haha well done GT!
That David Eckstein is soooo cheap when he was with the Angels he would go to the library to use the computer because he didn't want to buy one for himself.
by LAMuscleFag on Apr 17, 2008 2:09 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
ghtd that is :)
That David Eckstein is soooo cheap when he was with the Angels he would go to the library to use the computer because he didn't want to buy one for himself.
by LAMuscleFag on Apr 17, 2008 2:10 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Roadie for an 80's hair band
complete with standard issue hair for that time….
by Captain Fubar on Apr 17, 2008 2:09 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Insurance Adjuster
Probably deals with lead paint claims, divorced, and significantly out of shape.
I worked with him right out of college while I was still in grad school. Kind of douche, because of the recent influx of younger kids coming in, even though he is only like 28.
Oh, and he never forgets to mention to you that he is being “groomed” for management. Oddly enough, his wife is pretty hot.
by krushcuts on Apr 17, 2008 2:16 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
UPS
I work for a UPS store and he looks like he should be a UPS truck driver.
Or beer truck driver.
Or, add a mustache, tight jeans, and a 1984 Firebird, and you have an 80
s rock band Roadie
by mcbheath on Apr 17, 2008 2:19 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I think the he looks like:
A guy who’d be one of those seemingly honest auto mechanics, where there’s just something a little off about about him, but you can’t quite put your finger on it and so you think it’s prolly just your imagination and he’s prolly actually is an upstanding guy and you should stop over thinking things like this cause there’s nothing you can do about it since you don’t know enough about cars to ever figure out if he’s screwing you or not, but every time you deal with him a little voice in the back of your head won’t shut up about how he’s definitely screwing you over and that you should start taking your car somewhere else.
"Sabean did a good job on selling high on Liriano." -Excel Hearts Choi
by thedirkatron on Apr 17, 2008 2:55 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
winner winner
chicken dinner
by ghostofErikThompson on Apr 17, 2008 3:26 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
He looks like a
Short order cook or a Dishwasher at a homeless shelter.
"My death certificate will probably say: 'Cause of Death: World Series.'" Jamey Newberg
by boomer1 on Apr 17, 2008 2:57 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Adam Jones
I don’t know but your post made me think of this picture which might be the worst picture of any MLB player out there…
by jctrampe on Apr 17, 2008 3:31 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
strangely enough
He looks like a 1st grade teacher I know of, which is kind of creepy, because that guy always sort of gave me the creeps…in the smiles-too-much kind of way.
by naropean on Apr 17, 2008 4:14 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
a stunt man
a dirtbike mechanic
the guy who holds Burt Reynolds’ jacket when the director declares quiet on the set before the “gets into Trans Am” scene
Bruno Kirby hovering over Leonardo DiCaprio during the lockerroom scene in Basketball Diaries
Magglio Ordonez
Ricky Gervais’ Alabaman cousin
by shroomer on Apr 17, 2008 4:31 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I also thought he
looked a little like Magglio Ordonez.
Formerly known as OKRangerFan
by B_Black on Apr 17, 2008 4:44 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
A man who likes to drink beer.
He also looks a little like Frank Catalanatto, that’s who i thought it was at first.
Grime, "the magic shortening that spreads like lard."
by jcAustin on Apr 17, 2008 5:05 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
He looks like ...
... that dude from the movie “The Accused” who was lining the guys up and deciding who was next to get a piece of Jodie Foster.
by Melmart1 on Apr 17, 2008 6:02 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
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