Josh Hamilton Facts
by UrbanDad on May 6, 2008 10:58 PM CDT
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PrintSince I've been ripping off the Chuck Norris facts for the game-day threads, I thought we could come up with our own Josh Hamilton "facts."
For starters:
* Bud Selig didn't stop the 2002 All Star Game because the managers ran out of pitchers, they got word that Josh Hamilton had changed the channel.
* On the day he was born, Josh Hamilton's line was: .367/.653/1.097.
* Before calling strikes, umpires ask for Josh Hamilton's permission.
* Josh Hamilton once hit a ball over the fence in Anaheim... from Tampa.
Anyone else?
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Hmm
Hamilton is so good, women can’t handle his long shots from his wood.
HR tonight
Did they say how long that shot was? I was sorta TIVOing through the game. Went a long damn way.
i think the issue is
that hamilton hits them really high up into the air. I think distance traveled doesn’t give as accurate an account
Rare Gnats Sex
Most people smoke rocks....
Josh Hamilton smokes boulders.
brettgardner's mom is a stupid bitch.
by LSBUser on May 7, 2008 8:05 AM CDT reply actions
I started a thread on NMLR Forum last night...
that ended up becoming a sort of illustrated version of this:
Josh Hamilton Fact
On one of my fantasy baseball teams, I put everyone on the bench but Josh Hamilton, and I’m leading the league in Wins, Saves and ERA.
"that suzuki guy should go back to making cars" - My girlfriend after C.J.'s close in game 2
Hamilton Facts
Hamilton has to pay a quarter of his salary to replace windshields of cars which are hit by his home runs, and the club pays for the ones in batting practice.
Hamilton doesn’t use a bat, he just swats the ball out of the yard with his hands.
When Hamilton is at the plate and the call is made to the bullpen, everyone is too afraid to answer.
When Hamilton comes to the plate, the pitcher dons catchers gear. And so do the rest of the fielders.
People look back into history and say, “That Babe Ruth was certainly no Josh Hamilton”
After healing the sick and walking on water, Josh Hamilton likes to park a pitch into the bleachers each day.
more stupid hamilton facts.
Hamilton doesn’t swing and miss, the balls get scared and run away.
Hamilton gets intentionally walked with the bases loaded .
Hamilton doesn’t need PED’s, he needs a warning label.
It's the Walker, Texas Ranger / Chuck Norris lever
It brings up clips from the show, out of context. It’s really hilarious.
and
Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1.
Josh Hamilton’s balls are named Franklyn German and Sidney Ponson.
Josh Hamilton makes Jon Daniels look like he knows what he’s doing.
by clark on May 7, 2008 2:44 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
"Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1."
That’s tops, right there. That is just an awesome statement.
Hamilton
once meditated on the name Drew Meyer. Drew hit 25 consecutive home runs in batting practice that day. Unfortunately that was the day before the Rangers drafted him.
...and curse Sir Walter Raleigh, he was such a stupid git.
This thread had grown tiresome until Josh Hamilton himself posted on it.
brettgardner's mom is a stupid bitch.
by LSBUser on May 7, 2008 9:32 PM CDT reply actions
what?
???
Every loss is one step closer to the top of the 2009 draft!
by knockoutking on May 9, 2008 12:48 PM CDT up reply actions
Sexson
Hamilton’s arrival to the pile made Sexson immediately burst into tears.
Picking a random blog comment and wielding it as a club to bash "blogs" is like picking a random romance novel off an airport bookstore shelf and saying, "This book sucks. Fuck you, Tolstoy -- your medium is worthless!" - Ken Tremendous
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