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Joaquin Arias' egomania as big as my beastliness

Lonestarball_tiny by miles on Comment 352 comments

Who does this guy think he is?

First of all, he owes his soul to this organization for sticking with him through his complete shit play and his injuries. 

"I don't know what happened last year," Arias said. "I want to forget about last year."

You don't know what happened last year?  Lets start with you measly body getting injured like it always does.

I'm reading this DMN article about this guy and it is making me sick. 

"It's my passion to play shortstop," Arias said. "But I'll play anywhere."

Ok, do I also need to remind him how many errors he had at shortstop?  Yeah, like 6 high fives worth.  IN AA.

"Maybe one day I'll play every day with another team," Arias said.

Oh, its nice to know you are so dedicated to this organization that you are already thinking about where you are going to play next.

Ive never liked this kid, he thinks he is so cool because he was part of the A-Rod deal.  Know what?  Well I have news, you are a nobody Arias, A nobody.

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Alright, you know how my wallet and stuff got lost?  I called them and told them to send me a new card which they did.  They gave me a new pin and so I went to the ATM and the pin didn't work.  I stood there doing it like 20 times getting more and more angry.  Then I was doing it again, and the damn machine ATE the card and said that the bank requested that it take it.  I get pissed.

So I started a chase account here, which is good because I was getting annoyed paying 6 dollars every time I use an ATM machine here(no Bank of America's here)

The people at chase are pretty slimy, all hidden fee's and shit.  I avoided all this stuff, but banks are slimy people.

Walmart pisses me off.  They think they are so slick with their 6 dollars an hour salary, they think they have power.  I went with a few people at 4:30 in the morning and want to ride the electric wheelchairs or whatever.  So we start riding them and they start yelling to stop.  I'm like no, I'm going like 1 mile per hour I think you can walk over here.  They come over and tell me to get off.  I say no, I am a paying customer and we are the only people in the store so its not that big of a deal. 

Then the other night, I go with different people and I start throwing balls around.  My friend throws one at one of the signs that hangs from the ceiling over the frozen food section and the sign falls.  I see this guy with a few people cracking up, and I'm like "hey that guy looks familiar".  My ex is like "thats our sociology professor".  I start cracking up, our professor is 24 years old and looks like your typical frat guy.  Its just funny because I didn't recognize who he was at first.  Well anyway, I go up to the front of the store and get confronted by these walmart employees.  They are like "hand over you alls balls".  I was like "no, I'm buying this".  Long story short, they got pissed.  They know I hide balls all over the store whenever I go which is like everyday.  Those people hate me there, I don't care though. 

Who are they?

Who be me?

Thats what I thought.

 

 

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walmart

if wally word is your past time, i recommend finding a kid that will drive you further to cooler stuff. i spent my 1st couple years at ETSU or A&M Commerce and after a certain point i came to realize that if i was willing to end up at Walmart for an evening of fun and hell-raising, i coulda probably done better.

that and you end up collecting every Nerf Gun ever created.

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 25, 2008 1:53 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

It all started

With the laundry.

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

by Ed Coffin on Aug 25, 2008 2:15 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

But Miles

I thought it was Elvis you said was going to be a bust?

A Lonestar in California

We need to hire Chuck Norris to kick the ass of any Ranger fan caught booing one of our young pitchers at the RBiA.

by lonestarJon on Aug 25, 2008 3:34 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Im confused M,

I thought Arias was your fav player?

The bloggerformelyknownasBigBaddBubbaJ

by NYTXFAN on Aug 25, 2008 7:20 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I do.

He shouldn’t be so picky and choosy right now and thinking about his future without the Rangers.

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 10:42 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Arias is trade bait

OK .. I;m not going further with this thread. It’s to long and I’m tired and need to get some sleep. I’ve got to catch a flight out for Charleston, SC in the morning. I’m going to bed.

Hey Miles... Our HP Boy had dinner with Troy Aikman and Tony Romo

by hurlerhurley on Aug 28, 2008 12:09 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

lol

how long ar eyou up there miles?

Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1. -- clark

by knockoutking on Aug 25, 2008 8:19 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

He's looking like the classic

7 year student to me…

Or the 1 year student.

by JBImaknee on Aug 25, 2008 9:08 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

x

“A lotta people go to college for seven years.”

“I know. They’re called doctors.”

by brettgardner on Aug 25, 2008 9:23 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I was going to post

some comment about immaturity, until I remembered some of the things I did in college…and after college…and last week…

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 25, 2008 9:30 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You

Rode around in the motorized carts? I’m all for reasonably stupid hi-jinks, but that’s an 8th grade move, not a college one.

by brettgardner on Aug 25, 2008 9:35 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Ok,

I never did any of those stupid things in Walmart. I did attempt to destroy myself in many different ways in college, but I didn’t take it out on other people or destroy (much) property intentionally.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 25, 2008 9:53 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

One of my college friends rode one of those motorized carts around

(we were in college)

He reasoned that those were for people who couldn’t walk and because he was completely wasted, he couldn’t walk. The staff glared at him, but it was like 2 a.m., so they didn’t say much. Just prayed for him to leave, I think.

-- Micah
Baseball Is My Boyfriend
"Davis with 3 ribbies ... you can't hold a good man down." - LonestarJon
"Maybe not, but I'd like to." - Me

by baseballismyboyfriend on Aug 25, 2008 10:01 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Haha, exactly.

The lady that told us to get off was like “these are for 80 year olds”

I say “What 80 year olds are shopping at walmart at 4:30 in the morning?”

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 10:41 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You should

try it, its fun

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 10:41 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

it's not immaturity

It’s being a dick. Peoples who work overnight at Wal-Mart have it hard enough without some rich kid coming in and destroying everything. Riding motorized carts at 4 in the morning is a victimless crime, however immature, but knocking stuff over and breaking things is just a dick move.

by naropean on Aug 25, 2008 11:00 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

hahaha seriously?.. its their job to work at..well their workplace.. and if they have to clean it up.. they're getting paid for it.

Rich kid? Any kid would do that when he/she is bored, and breaking things..who’s losing money..you? the employees? Nope. i figure sam walton’s descendants can cover the cost of a sign or two, after they’re done wiping themselves with dollar bills.

baseBALLIN!

by kevzta on Aug 25, 2008 3:51 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

People like you

Are the dregs of society.

Did you ever stop to consider that perhaps the cost of cleaning up, coupled with the cost of delaying or canceling other tasks is more higher than the minimum wage the person is likely earning?

That’s not to say nothing of the incredible sense of arrogance one would have to display in order to put their own petty desires above somebody else who’s doing nothing more than trying to earn a living.

You’re bored? Here are a couple tips: read, run, slap it, get pussy. The path to loserdom is paved with low-scale destruction and petty crimes.

by brettgardner on Aug 25, 2008 4:17 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

hahaha i've never actually broken anything for the purpose of knowing that someone will have to clean it up.

and i have never done somehting that would make life any harder on anyone else. i was only trying to defend what miles was doin, because in all seriousness, i see little wrongdoing in what he did. But at the same time, if someone works as a janitor, its understood that they..clean? correct? So what is the big deal if one makes a mess, in a store with janitors/ employees that clean, they’ll clean it up. If cleaning is so degrading, why are there so many employees in superstores, clothing storees that are employed for the purpose of cleaning, that apply for these jobs knowing exactly what they will have to do? hahaha get off your high horse! you want to call people out on having a little fun. Some people are young people who do little things to get a rush with their friends. Its happened forever. So you can complain about “those young people these days” because those people don’t really care. Ive never vandalized any property in my life. If you think riding around on electric scooter at wal mart is petty crime/ lowscale destruction, when a sign falls down, you are crazy. Loserdom is when you classify slapping it a primary way of having fun, or referring to it as “slapping it.” haha

baseBALLIN!

by kevzta on Aug 25, 2008 6:11 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

i worked at a banana republic over the summer

and i could have cared less when people made a mess because, i would clean it up and it was my job. I signed up for it, but i was getting paid, so i didnt care at all.

baseBALLIN!

by kevzta on Aug 25, 2008 6:13 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I think you're missing the point.

"The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance."-Socrates

by slc ranger on Aug 25, 2008 6:16 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I worked at a banana republic over the summer

Sounds about right…

Last week I took a pleasure trip. I drove my wife to the airport.

by Brian Thomas on Aug 25, 2008 6:24 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I should have taken you to my high school reunion instead of my wife

You resume fluffer, you.

And I run a 7 minute mile on a good day, fyi…

Last week I took a pleasure trip. I drove my wife to the airport.

by Brian Thomas on Aug 26, 2008 8:45 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Hah...

6 min 45 sec, puss.

"The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance."-Socrates

by slc ranger on Aug 26, 2008 10:52 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

run a mile

that would take me at least a half hour.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 26, 2008 11:01 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Yes but bringing me might raise a whole new set of problems

“You’ve brought a what, B. Carter? A "Huntress”? So is that like a man-slave or what’s the deal here?"

The 40 Trumps All!!!

by thedirkatron on Aug 27, 2008 2:06 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Miles

you’re my boy! what’s up dude? forget what the haters say and keep your head up!

and you sound like you have an awesome time at wal mart! lol

Free Palestine!

by The Ahmad on Aug 25, 2008 9:31 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Ahmad!

Long time so see, glad to see your posting here again.

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 10:42 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

+1

idk whose worse, steal home or the ahmad

Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1. -- clark

by knockoutking on Aug 26, 2008 10:06 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Steal Home

It’s just the sheer volume of his stupidity that puts him over the top.

At least ahmad doesn’t post his drivel everywhere all the time.

Steal Home has become fucking ubiquitous.

The 40 Trumps All!!!

by thedirkatron on Aug 26, 2008 4:24 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

ubiquitous

i have never used that word in my life.

by oc on Aug 26, 2008 4:31 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

that’s right up there with protocol and copacetic

by oc on Aug 26, 2008 4:33 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Come on now, no need to butter that bread

I see ubiquitous used in conversation all the time.

Like everywhere…

Last week I took a pleasure trip. I drove my wife to the airport.

by Brian Thomas on Aug 26, 2008 8:43 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

i saw it used in a lecture today

had to look it up

Would have been better to use omnipresent

by laxtonto on Aug 27, 2008 5:36 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

yea

at least ahmad at least backs his stuff up some (like his 3 trades)

steal home effing KILLS me

Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1. -- clark

by knockoutking on Aug 27, 2008 12:49 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

ok

so everyone notices it, didn’t know if it was just me

by slash on Aug 29, 2008 1:29 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Getting kicked out of walmart

we’ve all been there. It’s like an American pastime I think. Mine was for playing dodgeball with the big bouncy balls in the middle of the walmart store.

Glad to hear you’re having fun Miles.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 9:58 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Getting kicked out of walmart

we’ve all been there. It’s like an American pastime I think.

Umm, no we haven’t. And no it’s not, except for idiots.

Offense doesn't doubt me, but my first and primemost thing is defense and punt return and kickoff return

by Brett Perryman on Aug 25, 2008 10:35 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

-1

Your wrong as always.

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 10:36 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

-100

for being a college student who doesnt know how to spell “you’re”

by 6th street on Aug 26, 2008 2:53 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Aikman and Bradshaw?

Please. They are in the same league as Trent Dilfer and Jim McMahon as QBs who were taken to the SB by great Defenses and great Running Games.
-DJCahill

by SarasotaRanger on Aug 26, 2008 5:21 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You know what the problem is Z?

You think just because you’re typing instead of speaking to me face to face you can call me names. I’m trying to have fun here and you call me an idiot. You’re unbelievable.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 1:10 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I would like to think

that I wasn’t talking about you. If you’re the type that behaves that way in stores, then you are clearly and idiot and I’d have no problem saying that in any forum. I don’t know that about you, though, so I don’t really feel like I’m calling you an idiot. I’m not even convinced that miles really acts like this. Again though, if you are 19 or older and doing this sort of stuff in stores, you really need to grow up. It’s pathetic behavior.

Offense doesn't doubt me, but my first and primemost thing is defense and punt return and kickoff return

by Brett Perryman on Aug 25, 2008 1:35 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Well I did it once

and I was about 19 then. I’m sure you were the perfect 19 year old though and never did anything that someone would deem immature on inappropriate so I guess you are in the right to call me in an idiot.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 2:17 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I don't understand

You seem to be admitting that it’s idiotic behavior for a 19 year old.

by brettgardner on Aug 25, 2008 2:24 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Sure

Doing something that’s borderline idiotic and being an idiot are two different things.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 2:43 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Well

I don’t think he was using the term “idiot” in the sense of an actually mentally deficient person, just the opposite actually— someone who knows the right thing to do and does the opposite.

So, by that standard, you could be an idiot when you’re 19 and not one when you’re 22 or whatever other age you choose.

by brettgardner on Aug 25, 2008 2:48 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Right

Offense doesn't doubt me, but my first and primemost thing is defense and punt return and kickoff return

by Brett Perryman on Aug 25, 2008 2:55 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Sure that makes sense

I just don’t based off on one story of mine and a sarcastic comment, I was an idiot even at 19. People do silly stuff all the time when they’re young. It doesn’t make them an idiot even at that age. I can think of so many things that would make me a bigger idiot…playing dodgeball in a walmart isn’t one of them.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 3:06 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Mmm.

Well, for my part, I freely admit being an idiot when the situation warrants it. I’ve been at Walmart in the middle of the night, TP’d stuff, and participated in most of the generally non-offensive douchbaggery of youth. I was an idiot. I got a ticket for going 120 in a 60. Idiot. Lied on here for no real reason. Idiotic. Last night I only got 2 hours of sleep. Terribly idiotic.

I’ve been an idiot most of my life. I’m still waiting to wake up from it.

by brettgardner on Aug 25, 2008 3:11 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

It's just that

there is “19 year old idiot” and “12 year old idiot” and this is 12 year old idiot. 19 year old idiot is drinking way more than you can handle, skipping classes that you shouldn’t, not using a rubber, etc. By the time a kid is 14 or 15 or at least 16 he should be past this sort of thing.

Offense doesn't doubt me, but my first and primemost thing is defense and punt return and kickoff return

by Brett Perryman on Aug 25, 2008 3:12 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Agree

That the acts in question are really junior high/freshman level. Even as a junior in high school I would have looked down snobbily upon such things.

by brettgardner on Aug 25, 2008 3:14 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You're too old to have any

perception with how 14 year olds act. You were a kid a long time ago, things change. Just because you goof around at walmart once doesn’t make you an idiot. One single evening doesn’t define my life back then so you could call the act idiotic but i wasn’t an idiot.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 3:56 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

"you're too old"

It’s really funny to hear someone say that.

I did this sort of stuff when I was in junior high. I’m 25 now. Screwing with people who hold down minimum wage jobs in Wal-Mart is junior high level idiotic. Sliding scales exist for stupid things, but that act is an exception.

I believe Z also said that if it’s an American pastime for you, then you’re an idiot. That implies something altogether different than “I did this once”.

by jwiscarson on Aug 25, 2008 4:58 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Really?

how so?

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 6:39 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I have never ever ever seen

someone support acting like a dumb shit so vigorously. If miles said that he’d taken to shooting dogs for sport and I questioned it, would you get all pissy at me?

Offense doesn't doubt me, but my first and primemost thing is defense and punt return and kickoff return

by Brett Perryman on Aug 25, 2008 6:51 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Shut up,

Thats just dumb. You are comparing killing something to harmless fun.

Jesus, I’m sure you were a perfect student when you went to school to.

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 7:00 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Okay

I promise, promise, promise that I won’t interact with these two morons any more.

You two goof balls can butcher our language and brag about being dumb shits without me criticizing you, I promise.

Offense doesn't doubt me, but my first and primemost thing is defense and punt return and kickoff return

by Brett Perryman on Aug 25, 2008 7:21 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Butcher the language?

You’re the one who has apparently just developed a blogging stutter.

Brag about being dumb shits? You are exaggerating so much it’s reached absurd levels.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 9:15 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You're being ridiculous...

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 9:00 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I'm going to guess here

and reply in case I guessed correctly (this being an idiotic act no matter what).

To me, when you start screwing with other people, particularly people who work a shitty job during shitty hours, that’s idiotic. Retail jobs are just about the worst jobs you can have, and the sheer number of people who come in to Wal-Mart surely make it the worst possible retail job imaginable, and that’s before you consider the kind of people who typically shop at Wal-Mart.

Maybe things are different where you and miles live, but around here, the vast majority of people who shop at Wal-Mart are trash who treat the employees like crap and leave junk all over the store. How is it acceptable for an adult to repeatedly contribute to this sort of situation?

by jwiscarson on Aug 25, 2008 7:27 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Umm

repeatedly? I said several times that I did it once. And explain how I messed with the employees? There was nobody in the store except employees and we didn’t break anything or really bother anyone. Explain how that is screwing with people? You don’t know the facts of the story at all so stop assuming stuff…You look foolish when you do that.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 9:02 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Good reading comprehension.

My original post drew the comparison between doing this once, and doing it repeatedly, as miles has. This entire argument has been about doing it repeatedly, as you said “an American pastime”.

by jwiscarson on Aug 25, 2008 9:41 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

The fact...

that someone could not only endorse but applaud this kind of douchebaggery is astonishing.

"I know you're a bit dense but no, it doesn't. Obviously lying isn't a problem for me."

by benmor78 on Aug 26, 2008 4:39 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Yeah

It makes you wonder what’s more pathetic: Miles being Miles or Agreen (presumably several years older) vehemently defending him.

"I’ll say something that doesn’t need context: anyone who is a Mariner’s fan is a douchebag." - FuturePants

by Chase Irwin on Aug 26, 2008 10:38 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

When did I defend MIles?

I was the one that said it was America’s pastime. I think what’s more pathetic is you attacking me without even getting the facts straight.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 26, 2008 11:40 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Same song and dance

http://www.lonestarball.com/2008/8/25/600608/joaquin-arias-egomania-as#8320237

I think your stance is clear here.

"I’ll say something that doesn’t need context: anyone who is a Mariner’s fan is a douchebag." - FuturePants

by Chase Irwin on Aug 26, 2008 11:51 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

This is interesting.

Especially given:

Getting kicked out of walmart

    we’ve all been there. It’s like an American pastime I think.
by Agreen07

Umm, no we haven’t. And no it’s not, except for idiots.
by zywica

Just because you goof around at walmart once doesn’t make you an idiot. One single evening doesn’t define my life back then so you could call the act idiotic but i wasn’t an idiot.
by Agreen07

I believe Z also said that if it’s an American pastime for you, then you’re an idiot. That implies something altogether different than "I did this once".
by jwiscarson
My original post drew the comparison between doing this once, and doing it repeatedly, as miles has. This entire argument has been about doing it repeatedly, as you said "an American pastime".
by jwiscarson

How can you accuse someone of not getting the facts straight when it’s clear as daylight that Z’s statement “And no it’s not, except for idiots.” refers to you saying “It’s like an American pastime I think.”?

by jwiscarson on Aug 27, 2008 12:29 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Because

in the first comment in your post just now he quoted me!!!!!!!!!!!

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 27, 2008 12:32 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I'm glad you care so much

about me though, n00b.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 27, 2008 12:33 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Ah, the intelligent retort.

I seriously thought you might have a brain behind the keyboard over there, and figured this was the world’s worst misunderstanding.

by jwiscarson on Aug 27, 2008 12:34 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

No..

no brain here. I am on pace to get my GED soon though so I’m pumped about that…yeehaaaaaaaaaaaa

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 27, 2008 12:43 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

It's still hard for me to figure out

what the hell you don’t understand here. Z wasn’t talking about you when he said “idiots”. Do you not know the definition of pastime? Do you think that doing something once makes it a pastime?

by jwiscarson on Aug 27, 2008 12:37 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I only revealed that I did it once

later on….good try though.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 27, 2008 12:42 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Really?

Z said that he would like to think he wasn’t talking about you. You then responded (seemingly confirming his suspicions) that you only did it once.

by jwiscarson on Aug 27, 2008 12:45 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I still have my collection!

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 27, 2008 8:18 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

What are you talking about?

I was the one that went to Wal-Mart….seriously Ben, I expected more from you.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 26, 2008 11:41 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Being a douchebag...

to people that are trying to work is a crappy thing to do. I never liked it when my friends did it to me when I was trying to work (pizza delivery and movie theaters), and it would really suck if it was someone you don’t even know.

"I know you're a bit dense but no, it doesn't. Obviously lying isn't a problem for me."

by benmor78 on Aug 27, 2008 1:02 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Who was a douchebag

to people that were trying to work?

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 27, 2008 8:18 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Who seems to have

a memory problem?

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 27, 2008 10:12 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I'm not sure?

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 27, 2008 10:24 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Your LSB life

is truly one big 1940s comedy sketch.

by robert_d_wilfong on Aug 28, 2008 12:25 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

He called me an idiot

not Miles…Nice try reading though?

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 3:04 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Is baby getting collicky?

Does baby need his bottle?

Last week I took a pleasure trip. I drove my wife to the airport.

by Brian Thomas on Aug 25, 2008 2:41 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

No..

baby has Ghost to make him feel nice and warm.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 2:44 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Ghost?

That seals it, you’re an idiot.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 25, 2008 11:43 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You're a nice person

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 26, 2008 12:06 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

It's a joke

So, destroying stuff at walmart is ok, but giving someone a hard time an a blog somehow makes me pathetic? Take it easy, lighten up.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 26, 2008 11:02 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

When did I destroy something?

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 26, 2008 7:50 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You didn't (I hope)

but you’re defending Miles in this thread.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 26, 2008 11:03 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You just said I did...

When am I defending MIles in this thread? I was the one who said that it is America’s pastime. I was defending myself. Are you wrong about everything in this thread lol??!

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 26, 2008 11:40 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I don't know anymore

This thread lost coherence a long time ago.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 26, 2008 11:51 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You were never defending yourself.

As I said multiple times, and again, if you re-read Z’s response to your original post, he said that if getting kicked out of Wal-Mart was your pastime, then you’re an idiot. You then said that it happened once, which by that very definition, does not lump you in with miles, a repeat-offender.

Given that knowledge and the way you vehemently defended your original statement, how was anyone supposed to know you were defending yourself when Z’s original statement was mentioned multiple times (by myself, no less)?

by jwiscarson on Aug 27, 2008 12:20 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I should say

that until I read this post by you, you were never defending yourself in my eyes.

by jwiscarson on Aug 27, 2008 12:21 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I was the one that said it was America's pattime

those were my words…..

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 27, 2008 12:31 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Haha,

Dodgeball sounds fun, I should try that next time I go.

One time I was trying to dunk on a 10 foot basket there with one of those balls and it bounced off and knocked down all these fishing poles.

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 10:37 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

its what you do when u live in a shit town

that likely barely has a dairy queen.

its either walmart or meth. heh.

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 25, 2008 10:35 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

+1

Ive noticed that ever since Ive gotten here Ive gotten more immature which is impossible.

You have to get creative to think of things to do here. Like following around high school tour groups and asking really dumb questions over and over.

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 10:39 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Aren't there girls there?

I can’t believe that hanging out at WalMart is leading you to the ladies. Unless those are the girls you’re trying to pick up?

by JBImaknee on Aug 25, 2008 11:12 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

+1000000

Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1. -- clark

by knockoutking on Aug 25, 2008 12:25 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

weakness

Commenting about pussy on LSB + picture of David Souter = sleeps with fat Czech women.

by 3k on Aug 27, 2008 7:56 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Heh

You’re the guy who thinks that he’s a comedian because he can quote “Fletch” in his sleep. I get it. Tell me though— this little quip right here, the “fat Czech women” one, have you sent that off to Jeffrey Ross yet, or are just testing it out on a fresh crowd first?

Shouldn’t you be at Walmart, though? It’s always 3am at Walmart, after all.

by brettgardner on Aug 27, 2008 9:56 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

now THAT is funny.

"Does this effectively hide my thunder?"

by Bob Loblaw on Aug 27, 2008 11:27 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Tour groups
You have to get creative to think of things to do here. Like following around high school tour groups and asking really dumb questions over and over.

Well, that must be a stretch.

he’s still hitting better than Saltalasuckia—while playing vastly superior defense...Athos

by Escher on Aug 25, 2008 11:36 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Choose Meth.

What's the secret to a long life? "I masturbate a lot"-Ernest Borgnine. http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008/08/14/icymi-ernest-borgnine-reveals-his-secret-for-everlasting-youth/#onepage

by DJCahill on Aug 25, 2008 1:47 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

hey, i know people who chose that option

i dont think school worked for them though.

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 25, 2008 3:59 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

How long

before this nonsense moves ups to the rec list?

Plaschke: Scioscia, the former Dodgers catcher, is the model manager who has created an atmosphere of winning.
Junior:It's that simple. Mike Scioscia brings a Glade Plug-In labeled "Winning™" into the clubhouse and everyone who breathes it in gains 15 points in average.

by TheBZA on Aug 25, 2008 10:25 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

soon

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 25, 2008 10:35 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I can't understand...

why anyone would rec this diary.

"The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance."-Socrates

by slc ranger on Aug 25, 2008 5:54 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I did

because I found a lot of the comments to be absolutely hysterical.

by jwiscarson on Aug 25, 2008 7:16 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

yuuup

same here

Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1. -- clark

by knockoutking on Aug 26, 2008 10:07 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

cue

The Dirkatron/Miles flamewar. I miss those days.

"You’re the only here who contributes schtick only." - brettgardner

by trza on Aug 25, 2008 11:02 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Hijinks like this ...

… make me twice as thankful to be self-employed now and working from home. From experience, I know that retail already sucks as a job, but to have to deal with teenagers with a serious case of arrested development creating extra work for you is even worse.

by Melmart1 on Aug 25, 2008 11:14 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Last time

I checked, riding electric carts doesn’t create extra work for employees…

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 11:16 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Umm ...

…. "They know I hide balls all over the store whenever I go which is like everyday. "

“My friend throws one at one of the signs that hangs from the ceiling over the frozen food section and the sign falls.”

“One time I was trying to dunk on a 10 foot basket there with one of those balls and it bounced off and knocked down all these fishing poles.”

Are you seriously trying to tell me that NONE of these things creates extra work for someone? Did you climb a ladder and re-hang the sign? Do you go back the next day and find all the balls you hid all over the store and put them back where they belong? Did you pick up every last one of those fishing poles and put them back in the right space?

by Melmart1 on Aug 25, 2008 11:23 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I picked up the

fishing poles.

But the balls all over the store give the store some flare, its so dull in there.

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 11:26 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

rofl

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 25, 2008 11:27 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Then you are creating extra work for someone ...

… and that is not ‘beastly,’ that is being an dickhead. And since when are heterosexual male teenagers who don’t work at TGI Friday’s worried about flare?

by Melmart1 on Aug 25, 2008 11:30 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

It's "flair" not "flare".

To the both of you. Once I was corrected in resounding fashion by Requiem for that mistake, so I’m just heading him off.

by Black Francis on Aug 25, 2008 11:37 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I spend all day ...

… writing and copy editing, so in my spare time, unless is something really egregious, I just let it be. Requiem can kiss my butt.

by Melmart1 on Aug 25, 2008 11:46 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Off-topic...

I don’t write/copy edit all day, but I do my fair share of it. Two of my friends are the worst typers in casual conversations. I always funnel my thoughts through that technical writing part of my brain. Do you not funnel everything through that part of your brain because you use it so much while working?

by jwiscarson on Aug 25, 2008 2:08 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I see everything with a copy editor's eye ...

… but I realized that trying to correct people, especially on the internet, would just serve to drive me nuts, so I learned to let most of it go. I rarely go back to check for typos or misspelled words, and that is by design. Now, the only thing that really bothers me is going to the grocery store and seeing signs that say “Fresh” Meat … do they realize that putting the word ‘fresh’ in quotation marks implies the opposite?

by Melmart1 on Aug 25, 2008 2:39 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I totally agree

regarding other people’s words. I only ever do it if someone’s being arrogant about the English language and has misused a word or has some other incredibly stupid typo.

Nevertheless, I still find myself re-writing my own sentences for clarity (although occasionally I just give up, convincing myself that it isn’t worth my time), or checking the definition of a word to make sure I’m using it properly.

by jwiscarson on Aug 25, 2008 5:01 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

The only time ...

… I bother with that is when I am trying to make a really important point, one where I wouldn’t want someone like Requiem to completely miss or ignore the point due to a typo.

Other than that, I generally don’t re-read what I write because my mind needs a break from correcting things all the time.

by Melmart1 on Aug 25, 2008 11:10 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Well....

since you insist….

SMOOCH

by Requiem on Aug 26, 2008 7:17 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

?

When did I do that?

I remember correcting you for some other spelling mistake, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t “flair.”

R

by Requiem on Aug 26, 2008 7:16 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You Know

The more I think about it, it may have been Brett Gardner. When he first showed up here. I don’t remember now.

Apologies for assuming it was you, but you and I did have some stupid arguments.

by Black Francis on Aug 26, 2008 4:02 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Sorry

Well I don’t remember who it fucking was, then. You know you’re argumentative, and you probably know that I am, so can you not see where I might draw the conclusion that it was one of you?

by Black Francis on Aug 26, 2008 8:06 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Shortest Fuse Ever

“…it may have been Brett Gardner…I don’t remember now.”

That’s libelous and I’m a fuck? Whatever, man. My advice is to let go of the anger, because that shit will suck the life right out of you.

by Black Francis on Aug 26, 2008 11:00 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Brett's

temper and argumentative spirit waxes and wanes. It’s in full flower this week.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 26, 2008 11:04 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Haha

"The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance."-Socrates

by slc ranger on Aug 26, 2008 10:54 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Why is Miles so Endearing?

Why do you guys keep recommending his posts? To me he seems like a spoiled miniature breed of dog. He’s like the Pomeranian or toy Poodle of LSB.

by Black Francis on Aug 25, 2008 11:35 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

That dog = beast

It's baseball. You don't always get what you want, and you don't always want what you get. --Ed Coffin

by txranger7 on Aug 25, 2008 11:42 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

-1

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 11:46 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

funny

That’s exactly what I imagined Miles would wear.

by naropean on Aug 25, 2008 11:48 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   1 recs

That dog should really be

attached as Miles icon.

What's the secret to a long life? "I masturbate a lot"-Ernest Borgnine. http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008/08/14/icymi-ernest-borgnine-reveals-his-secret-for-everlasting-youth/#onepage

by DJCahill on Aug 26, 2008 10:13 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I agree

I think Adam should exercise his executive authority to do that.

by Black Francis on Aug 26, 2008 4:06 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

word

hey adam, is that in the forum constitution or do you wanna just pull a cambodia on our ass and do it for the good of the community?

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 26, 2008 10:14 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

ROFL

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 26, 2008 10:14 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You know, few people are bigger animal lovers than me

That said, I have always, always, had to fight the urge to do my best Ray Guy impersonation whenever I had the misfortune to stumble across a pomeranian. Just a godawfully fucking turrible breed. The worst.

That said, I love that little fuckwit of a mutt in the pic. To echo my esteemed colleague txranger7:

That dog = beast.

Last week I took a pleasure trip. I drove my wife to the airport.

by Brian Thomas on Aug 26, 2008 8:52 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 26, 2008 10:16 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

"urrible-turrible-turrible" - charles barkley
1. turrible
 The way the great Charles Barkley speaks of the actual English word “terrible.”
Used many times to describe teams such as the Milwaukee Bucks, Atlanta Hawks, and Minnesota Timberwolves

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=turrible

Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1. -- clark

by knockoutking on Aug 27, 2008 12:51 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

neither The Ahmad nor Agreen07 has recommended this post.

conclusion: miles has created three or four other profiles, which he only uses for upping his Rec total.

by oc on Aug 25, 2008 11:50 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Haha, no.

I could care less if this post gets rec’d or not.

Actually, I know it doesn’t deserve to be rec’d.

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

by miles on Aug 25, 2008 11:52 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You checking out my profile OC?

A/S/L?

let’s get it on.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 1:11 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I've started to think

that it’s a character that he does. No one is this pitiful. Of course he would have had to have played the bit since he was like 14, so that’s quite the commitment.

Offense doesn't doubt me, but my first and primemost thing is defense and punt return and kickoff return

by Brett Perryman on Aug 25, 2008 11:58 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

rec

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 25, 2008 4:01 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Old bitter man

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 1:12 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Agreed

this is at least partly shtick, he just wants attention. Spoiled brat.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 25, 2008 1:37 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

you're pathetic

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 2:18 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

miles?

Aikman and Bradshaw?

Please. They are in the same league as Trent Dilfer and Jim McMahon as QBs who were taken to the SB by great Defenses and great Running Games.
-DJCahill

by SarasotaRanger on Aug 27, 2008 8:13 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

HAHA

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 25, 2008 3:06 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

hahaa

Now it’s a lot easier picturing him running around Wal Mart in the dead of night fucking shit up.

by Black Francis on Aug 25, 2008 11:43 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Scenario

WalMart Assistant Manager: Hey, who’s that tall really dorky kid out there creating chaos in the store?
Night Stock Clerk: I don’t know, but he appears to be “not quite right”, so we don’t really want to get into trouble for picking on the handicapped.

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

by Ed Coffin on Aug 25, 2008 12:09 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   2 recs

HAHA

Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1. -- clark

by knockoutking on Aug 25, 2008 12:26 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Never realized

that one person can spark this much controversy on a baseball blog….Ah yes, I forgot all about the likes of CJ and Milwood.

"Well, the Dallas Mavericks got beat by the New Orleans Hornets last night ending their season. Word is that someone on the team is dating Jessica Simpson." - Jay Leno

LSB facebook group ---->>> http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=33345329288

by hinduplaya on Aug 25, 2008 4:38 PM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I rarely comment on LSB, but...

After seeing someone destroy what was my former forte (public comedy) in college, I had to respond.

Look, I’m all for having fun at Wal-Mart in the late hours of a collegiate night of stupidity, but I would offer this to both miles, you crazy kid you, and the community. It is both unattractive and unbecoming to mess with people’s property and energy to the point where you have them doing some nonsense at work. It is much more productive and enjoyable to mess with their minds and have them thinking nonsense. Here are some suggestions for harmless Wal-Mart fun from a former college dummy:

 - Stare at the balls in Wal-Mart until someone is forced to come over to you. This could take upwards of 30 minutes. When they finally do to ask you some insincere robotic line (ex: “Can I help you with something?”), tell them “Huh? Oh. I’m just considering how fall the ball industry has come after all these years.” Then continue to stare.

 - When you enter the store, make your way to the greeter. When he greets you, look digsustingly offended and reply, “Well if that’s the kind of greeting that passes muster around here, I’ll just take my business elsewhere” and leave.

 - Print off a map of Dallas from Google maps. Take it to the store. Wander from aisle to alternating your looks between the signs above the aisle and your map muttering stuff like “So, if this is aisle 6 and linens are over there, then Preston Road should be somewhere…wait…” or “I know Wal-Mart cashiers are always on the southern Wal-Martian border, so it should be right over here…”

 - (Restaurant fun #1) Walk up to the cashier and order a cheeseburger. After they get done running their yap, look confused and look around. Slap your eyes in that self-depricating way and say something to the effect of, “Oh damn. I did it again. I thought this was Taco Bueno. Sorry.”

 - (Restaurant fun #2) Walk up to the greeter with a friend and say “Party of two.” Wait patiently.

I have thousands of these and I still enjoy them more than destructive dumminess. If you ever end up in a mall, let me know. I wrote the book on mall fun.

by 3k on Aug 26, 2008 7:57 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

So I guess

We know now what would happen if Pauly Shore impregnated Ryan Reynolds and their child was nursed by Sandy Hackett.

The only thing remotely funny about any of those wacky hi-jinks is that you wasted more than 10 seconds recounting them.

Seriously, though, you should be careful about posting this stuff online. I mean, I hear Albert Brooks is looking for some new material, and I’d hate for you to get this gold stolen.

by brettgardner on Aug 26, 2008 9:12 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

1+

I think 3k is actually Neil Hamburger (youtube that name if you haven’t heard of him), the king of Anti-humor.

"Does this effectively hide my thunder?"

by Bob Loblaw on Aug 26, 2008 11:54 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

OK....I youtubed it

to save you the trouble.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnoj-3mIlVw

"Does this effectively hide my thunder?"

by Bob Loblaw on Aug 26, 2008 11:57 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

is that the guy we traded for?

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 26, 2008 10:19 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I wish Neil Hamburger were the newest Ranger

because then the team would no longer be the laughing stock of the AL..they would be the “awkward throat clearing” of the league.

"Does this effectively hide my thunder?"

by Bob Loblaw on Aug 27, 2008 1:10 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Uh, you're weak

Seriously. What is with the picture of David Souter? You’re the douchiest.

by 3k on Aug 27, 2008 7:52 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

x

I guess your comedy doesn’t extend to witty retorts. That’s fine. The world always needs more Carrot Tops and Gallaghers.

by brettgardner on Aug 27, 2008 9:58 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Carrot Top, Gallagher.

You’re being generous with those comps.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 27, 2008 10:09 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

True.

I actually like Gallagher.

by brettgardner on Aug 27, 2008 10:15 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Take that back

Last week I took a pleasure trip. I drove my wife to the airport.

by Brian Thomas on Aug 27, 2008 11:42 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

There's a

Place in this world for Gallagher.

by brettgardner on Aug 27, 2008 11:44 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

It's not

a pleasant place, though it’s much nicer than Carrot Top’s place.

O Freunde, nicht diese Töne!
Sondern laßt uns angenehmere anstimmen,
und freudenvollere.

by t ball on Aug 27, 2008 1:14 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

you should try coming back with something like

“What’s the deal with the black box? If it’s the only thing that survives the crash, then why don’t they make the whole plane out of the black box? Huh? Huh? Don’t get me started….”

"Does this effectively hide my thunder?"

by Bob Loblaw on Aug 27, 2008 11:29 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

its just like if miles was dumber and poorer...

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 26, 2008 10:20 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

And a better speller

"Over the last 15 months, we’ve traveled to every corner of the United States. I’ve now been in 57 states" - Barack Obama

by DaheelzCM on Aug 27, 2008 7:37 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Wow...

Hey, since Carlin passed away perhaps you could take his place.

"The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance."-Socrates

by slc ranger on Aug 26, 2008 10:57 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Restaurant fun #2:

most of the greeters at Wal-Mart are old…

this one might be useful.

by oc on Aug 26, 2008 11:15 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

at first...

I was like (--) and then I was like (--)

by Sky Hook on Aug 27, 2008 6:43 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

MILES what the hell is going on up there?!?!?

That sounds like a scene out of “What’s eating Gilbert Grape”.

Oh well boys will be boys :)

 I wouldn’t mind seeing a video of the whole ordeal though…

"California is the most liberal state in the union. No joke that place is probably going to slide into the ocean one of these days. California is a wasteland run by liberals"

-Sharky- what a nice guy huh? I guess he doesn't watch any TV shows or movies.. If California goes so goes the entertainment industry. What a nut job!!

by LAMuscleFag on Aug 26, 2008 9:58 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Who rec'd this diahrrea mess?

Aikman and Bradshaw?

Please. They are in the same league as Trent Dilfer and Jim McMahon as QBs who were taken to the SB by great Defenses and great Running Games.
-DJCahill

by SarasotaRanger on Aug 26, 2008 10:06 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

its worth a rec

 for the picture above if nothing else!

Every pitch thrown to Josh Hamilton is recorded as an E1. -- clark

by knockoutking on Aug 26, 2008 10:10 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

naw

ray guy!

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 26, 2008 10:20 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Hahahahahahaha

"The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance."-Socrates

by slc ranger on Aug 26, 2008 11:51 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Sorry...

ROFL?

I see it all the time and my internet lingo sucks.

"The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance."-Socrates

by slc ranger on Aug 27, 2008 12:27 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Never

I’ll lol on occasion, but ROFL usually just means LOL …

"I’ll say something that doesn’t need context: anyone who is a Mariner’s fan is a douchebag." - FuturePants

by Chase Irwin on Aug 27, 2008 12:46 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Yep

It was always my understanding that the scale is supposed to go (from lowest to highest):

LOL >>> LMAO/LMFAO >>> ROFL

A Lonestar in California

We need to hire Chuck Norris to kick the ass of any Ranger fan caught booing one of our young pitchers at the RBiA.

by lonestarJon on Aug 27, 2008 5:09 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

And then there's

ROFLMAOWSMTMN (rolling on floor laughing my ass off while shooting milk through my nose)

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 27, 2008 10:11 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Nice

I’ll be filing that away for use later.

A Lonestar in California

We need to hire Chuck Norris to kick the ass of any Ranger fan caught booing one of our young pitchers at the RBiA.

by lonestarJon on Aug 27, 2008 7:17 PM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

That just made

Reading the thread worth the time.

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

by Ed Coffin on Aug 27, 2008 12:33 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I am validated as a human being.

There is a special place in heaven for Adam Jehosaphat Morris.

"One man, five scoops." -- shroomer

by ghtd36 on Aug 27, 2008 12:42 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

$5

says Miles did it himself…Pure Genius.

"Sooner or later, prospects kill you, because you hang onto them." - Greggo, 11/22/2005

by Agreen07 on Aug 27, 2008 12:43 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Not a bad theory

Most things Miles says he does, he actually does. Alone. In a dark place. Quietly. Sometimes with props. For long periods of time.

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

by Ed Coffin on Aug 27, 2008 12:49 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I knew something epic was up in this thread

When I saw Miles’ profile pic had changed on the front page. And it is epic indeed.

And sort of scary too.

A Lonestar in California

We need to hire Chuck Norris to kick the ass of any Ranger fan caught booing one of our young pitchers at the RBiA.

by lonestarJon on Aug 27, 2008 5:13 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

You're welcome

Plaschke: Scioscia, the former Dodgers catcher, is the model manager who has created an atmosphere of winning.
Junior:It's that simple. Mike Scioscia brings a Glade Plug-In labeled "Winning™" into the clubhouse and everyone who breathes it in gains 15 points in average.

by TheBZA on Aug 27, 2008 8:06 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Solid gold.

Aikman and Bradshaw?

Please. They are in the same league as Trent Dilfer and Jim McMahon as QBs who were taken to the SB by great Defenses and great Running Games.
-DJCahill

by SarasotaRanger on Aug 27, 2008 8:15 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

FANTASTIC!!!

love you adam!!

"I’m sure you’ve seen Kiker before but I’ll just reiterate that the kid is mean on the mound. He is only 5’10’’ but he is an intimidator. He looks like he hates hitters. He has the juice for pressure situations."
-Jason Parks on Jul 22, 2008 10:08 PM

by Jayslick on Aug 26, 2008 11:58 PM CDT reply reply actions actions   0 recs

O K so Miles has some growing up to do...

…as did a lot of us at his age however Miles I doubt the people at Wal-Mart making $6 an hour feel like they’re all that. I would bet that most of them hate their jobs and hate wearing that ugly ass blue schmock even more. When someone comes along and makes their life more difficult than it already is that’s adding insult to injury. The problem with some rich kids is that they don’t really understand the plight of those who struggle.
         Miles be nice to these people they have it hard enough. Greenie I have to give you an A for effort trying to defend this one. I’m a big Miles fan but the “making the mess” part of this story is truly unspinnable. It reminds me of the Larry Craig “wide stance” excuse. It just doesn’t flush.
        You are still the man Miles. I just hope that next time you deal with people who struggle through life that you’re kind and compassionate. Their life is hard enough they don’t need some rich kid treating them like a piece of shit. What would be a million times more attractive would be someone like yourself who comes from money treating them with dignity and respect. That’s much more becoming trust me.

"California is the most liberal state in the union. No joke that place is probably going to slide into the ocean one of these days. California is a wasteland run by liberals"

-Sharky- what a nice guy huh? I guess he doesn't watch any TV shows or movies.. If California goes so goes the entertainment industry. What a nut job!!

by LAMuscleFag on Aug 27, 2008 9:37 AM CDT reply reply actions actions   1 recs

Well put.

Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.

by t ball on Aug 27, 2008 10:11 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Sort of

The sentiment was good but I have to take off points for his snobby portrayal of the folks that work at a place like Walmart.

"Over the last 15 months, we’ve traveled to every corner of the United States. I’ve now been in 57 states" - Barack Obama

by DaheelzCM on Aug 27, 2008 10:28 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

I was focusing more on the

we should be nice to people aspect of it. When someone snaps back at Miles’ childishness and mean-spirited ways we’ll get a “I’m pissed!” diary.

O Freunde, nicht diese Töne!
Sondern laßt uns angenehmere anstimmen,
und freudenvollere.

by t ball on Aug 27, 2008 10:44 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

And we all know what happens when Miles gets pissed off ...

"I’ll say something that doesn’t need context: anyone who is a Mariner’s fan is a douchebag." - FuturePants

by Chase Irwin on Aug 27, 2008 10:50 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

He starts yipping

and chasing his tail in that adorable way of his?

"Oh well, McCain is pretty communist anyway,... we can be 70% communist with McCain,"-Sharky

by DJCahill on Aug 27, 2008 11:07 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

ummmm excuse me..

I have a friend who works at Walmart. I don’t judge him at all. At least he’s working. They don’t treat their employess that well…they’re making $6 an hour…which after taxes is like $170 a week after taxes. I admire anybody who can do that….and survive. Yes the schmocks are ugly but the employees are admirable.

"California is the most liberal state in the union. No joke that place is probably going to slide into the ocean one of these days. California is a wasteland run by liberals"

-Sharky- what a nice guy huh? I guess he doesn't watch any TV shows or movies.. If California goes so goes the entertainment industry. What a nut job!!

by LAMuscleFag on Aug 27, 2008 10:45 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

For what its worth ...

… I didn’t take what you said as snobby towards Wal-Mart or retail employees in general at all. Hell, my stepdad still works there, he is full time and the “benefits” or what passes for them are laughable, as is the wage.

I used to work for HEB (do you guys have HEB in the metroplex? I think you at least have a Central Market) and if a punk like Miles pulled this crap, I would have told him to leave, period. We all worked too hard for too little for anyone (no matter if he is rich or not) to purposely act like a jackass and make more work for us. It’s common decency, no matter how much your paycheck reads at the end of the week.

by Melmart1 on Aug 27, 2008 10:53 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

How long has your stepdad worked there?

"Over the last 15 months, we’ve traveled to every corner of the United States. I’ve now been in 57 states" - Barack Obama

by DaheelzCM on Aug 27, 2008 10:57 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

Oh, man ...

… quite awhile. I think something like almost a decade now, at least eight years. My mom worked there almost 20 years ago when she was preggers with my youngest brother, and she liked it at the time, of course this was before Sam Walton died, they treated their employees a lot better then.

Why do you ask?

by Melmart1 on Aug 27, 2008 11:01 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

The reason I ask

And now I am going to sound like a snob but…

If the pay and benefits are so bad then why hasn’t he found another job?

"Over the last 15 months, we’ve traveled to every corner of the United States. I’ve now been in 57 states" - Barack Obama

by DaheelzCM on Aug 27, 2008 11:12 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

how SNOBBY of you!!!!

maybe he enjoys struggling and just getting by!!

:) just kidding

"California is the most liberal state in the union. No joke that place is probably going to slide into the ocean one of these days. California is a wasteland run by liberals"

-Sharky- what a nice guy huh? I guess he doesn't watch any TV shows or movies.. If California goes so goes the entertainment industry. What a nut job!!

by LAMuscleFag on Aug 27, 2008 11:14 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions   0 recs

That's his personal decision ...

… I don’t like that he hasn’t tried to make a better life for him and my mom, but it’s really none of my business. Of course, you have to factor in that at this point, starting over somewhere else would be nearly as bad, being low man on the totem pole again.

Nonetheless, that doesn’t take away from the fact that health insurance that costs more than 1/4 of your monthly salary from a company making billions is just ridiculous. I know they can get a better deal for their employees if they would just pony up a little more themselves.

by Melmart1 on Aug 27, 2008 11:23 AM CDT to parent up reply reply actions actions