Well, I sure was glad I was stuck on the road until 9 pm so I could listen to that bloodbath.
Drew Davison has a post game storyy where we learn that giving up a bunch of homers isn't charming if you aren't Japanese. T.R. Sullivan chooses to highlight the valuable roles Robinson Chirinos and Josh Lindblom are serving on this team by signaling, with their appearance, when a game is officially a lost cause. Evan Grant's has some post-game thoughts, noting that David Murphy is terrible in a replaceable way and Justin Grimm is terrible in a less replaceable way. Todd Wills has his rapid reactions and postgame thoughts.
In other news, Todd Wills had a notes column where we learn that Jeff Baker had a setback in his recovery because that's what Rangers on the DL do and Good News Everyone!, Jurickson Profar is making progress in the outfield. Wills also says Soria could be in the Rangers pen by this weekend.
Richard Durrett gives out his first-half awards, and Elvis sneaks away with the "Would be Run Out of Town on a Rail if He Weren't Such a Lovable Scamp" trophy.
The Rangers signed four players as the international signing period began, Jose Almonte, Yeyson Yrizarri, Marcos Diplan, and Michael De Leon. Evan Grant quotes Jon Daniels that the organization has a "long-term vision."
In a story posted before his thorough shellacking, Justin Grimm says that he's happy with his first half.
T.R. Sullivan has a writeup on the Dominican harvest from Tuesday, and a notes column that covers Jeff Baker's setback, Holland facing King Felix, and Neal Cotts and Joe Nathan sharing the Rangers' player of the month award for June.
Finally, if you were picking contestants for a no-holds-barred fighting league that gave extra points to eating an opponent's face or mutilating his genitals, the chimpanzee would probably be your first choice. But you wouldn't want to sign one to pitch for your favorite baseball team... humans specifically evolved an ability to hurl objects much better than our furry kind.