Okay, I don't want to type "Saltalamacchia" over and over again.
However, I hate the nickname "Salty".
We were discussing nicknames earlier, and the one that I decided I liked was "Mach 5," although that may be due to me being a big Speed Racer nerd in my childhood.
Anyway, give me suggestions for a nickname, and I'll run a poll once I've got enough suitable ones to put up for a vote.