Here are my predictions on what you'll hear from various media folk about this trade:
From Jayson Stark: "Some execs don't know what Daniels was thinking in turning down the Anaheim offer. 'Kotchman is a Mark Grace clone, and Joe Saunders could step into their rotation right now,' said one A.L. exec. 'I have big questions about Saltalamacchia's bat playing at first base, and the rest of the guys they got are years away. I just don't know what the Rangers were thinking, unless they just didn't want to trade him within the division.'
However, the exec didn't realize that Saltalamacchia has the longest last name of any player in major league baseball history.
[1500 words of useless info about baseball players with long last names sent to him by Elias]"
From Peter Gammons: No actual analysis of the trade, but 2000 words on the level of interest the Red Sox and Yankees had in Teixeira and how wise they were for not meeting Jon Daniels' asking price, plus speculation about how great it will be for baseball when Boston and New York are bidding for Teixeira after the 2008 season.
From Randy Galloway: (We won't hear anything for a while, as he's in the middle of one of his four months worth of vacation he gets every year, but sometime in the middle of August, we'll get):
"This is a move the EGS never would have made, since it would have meant too much time away from the golf course. And his foursome would have been annoyed by his cell phone ringing.
"So give Jon Daniels credit for at least making a move.
"But the name of the game, as always, is pitching.
"That's why I liked the Adam Eaton trade.
"With the Rangers, if you can trade a pitcher and get two pitchers, that's a win.
"Since Daniels only got two pitchers, neither of them ready for the majors, this was a bad trade.
"Especially because they traded away a pitcher in the deal.
"Daniels clearly was drinking too much Cuervo when he made that trade.
"It is all Tom Hicks fault."
From Jennifer Floyd Engel: Whatever Galloway says, but kicked up a notch. Oh, and there will be a reference to "A-Fraud."
From Jim Rome: "Atlanta Braves just got Mark Teixeira from the Rangers. (8 second pause). Yeah, that doesn't suck. Schuerholz, big jungle guy, he has that jungle karma. How great is that for him? He had (4 second pause for comedic effect) the 89 year old Julio Franco at first base. (8 second pause). And now he has Mark Teixeira. Hilaaaaaaaarious.
(15 second pause)
"How great is that? Atlanta's now got a guy...switch hitter, drives in a lot of runs, and absolutely witch with the glove. (8 second pause). Adds him to a team with a lot of great jungle guys, guys like Chipper Jones...great interview, we're going to have him back on the TV show next week, great jungle guy. And Teixeira can hit.
(10 second pause)
"I mean, Teixeira can really hit. And to get him, Teixeira, a perennial MVP candidate, a great jungle guy, for a bunch of minor leaguers? (5 second pause) Minor leaguers? Guys who will likely never get more than a cup of coffee, for a future Hall of Famer like my man Tex? A great jungle guy, we need to get him in for an interview. Yeah, that doesn't suck. Except for the Rangers, who are now looking at, what, 120 losses next year? Yeah, good luck with that Rangers fans.
(10 second pause)
"Got an email here. 'If the Braves don't win it all, I'm lopping off Teixeira's dome. Sincerely, Orenthal.' Now, that's not funny clones. (Reads 10 more Orenthal emails)"
From John Kruk: It doesn't matter, because I won't be able to pay attention to whatever he says, because he has a cabbage for a head.
From Jean-Jacques Taylor: A whole column about how what various Cowboys players think of the trade, ending it with, "If the players the Rangers get perform, this will be a good trade for Daniels."
From Peter King: "#c of the non-football things I think I think: I think it is really sad that major league baseball's competitive imbalance is such that the Rangers would trade a great player like Mark Teixeira, without him ending up in Boston. I just about choked on my Starbucks Grande Mocha Latte (only my 4th of the day) when I was sitting in the Delta terminal, waiting for my free upgrade to first class in exchange for a column mention, and saw Boston didn't land Teixeira. Not that Big Papi really needs any more protection, but it reminds me of when my daughter's softball team could have added another slapper to get out of the Montclair Regionals, and the commissioner wouldn't change the transfer rules to allow that to happen. Bad for the sport. And when I was talking to Roger Goodell on his cell phone (with Tiki Barber holding for me on the other line, while I was standing next to Bill Parcells and the ghost of Vince Lombardi), he told me he'd never let that happen in the NFL."
From Dale Hansen: A feature on Channel 8 talking to all the Cowboy players Jean-Jacques Taylor didn't get to, about their thoughts on the Teixeira trade.
From Jim Reeves: "I hope Tom Hicks learned his lesson. He fired Buck Showalter because Mark Teixeira didn't like him. Now, Buck has scheduled 3 minutes of laughing (at 9:51 a.m., right after his 15 minute sock inspection in the Indians clubhouse and his 9:54 conference call with the Indians minor league managers on what degree angle minor leaguers should be wearing their hats at) over the situation Hicks finds himself in.
Sell the team, Tom. Unless you are going to bring Buck back. Or hire Trey Hillman. Either of those would be fine. Otherwise, sell the team."
From Jeff Sullivan: "Michael Young and Ian Kinsler suck."