Ha ha ha, Rangers, you've had your fun. Now, seriously, get back to sucking.
T.R. Sullivan recaps last night's game, with the Rangers going bonkers in the 9th. Bogar said that he was thinking about pinch hitting Sardinas for Arencibia, but "sometimes your stomach is smarter than your head." There you go, folks, going with the gut is an organizational philosophy.
Sullivan teeters on the knife edge of relating a juicy story about Jon Daniels seeking advice from Kenny Williams about hiring an outspoken manager in 2006 but, sadly, veers drunkenly back into staid and unexciting tedium. You know what would have been a better ending to "Daniels and Kenny Williams talk about Ozzie Guillen" than "the details of the conversation are not pertinent?" Literally anything.
T.R. Sullivan observes that the Rangers are unlikely to exercise Alex Rios' 2015 option. Rios provided us with replacement level production this year for $12 million, so I, for one, will not be pouring out a forty for him.
Derek Holland has been born again hard.
Jon Daniels says he probably won't be interviewing managerial candidates until after the season.
Evan Grant scouts the matchups for today's game.
Finally, in news that should come as a surprise to approximately no one, chimpanzees are inherently violent and do not initiate "wars" amongst themselves due to human influence. So they do not eat people's faces or bite their hands off or violently brutalize their testicles due to human cultural pollution, they've always been crazy.