Nick Tepesch will get to cool his heels on the major league disabled list because misery loves company. The good news is that he'll get to keep collecting his major league salary, the bad news is that he might get hit by an errant lightning bolt aimed by the gods at a name player.
Jeff Banister says that he still likes Tanner Scheppers as a friend and that he's got a great personality, but maybe he shouldn't be pitching when the game is on the line.
Prince Fielder finally hit a home run last night! That's... really something, I guess!
Hey, here's something: Matt Harrison may be returning to the mound in time for the Rangers to be ridiculously out of contention.
Josh Hamilton will be spending some time in Arizona while Arte Moreno tries to find somewhere to dump him.
Matt Harrison is targeting a June return because that would maximize the spiritual agony from his inevitable return to the DL.
T.R. Sullivan has a recap of last night's win.
And, finally, bro's before ho's, jeez, what's wrong with you people?