13-20 - Rangers make Petco Park look ugly, lose again

It's the year 2017 and Trevor Cahill one-hit the Rangers.

Trevor Cahill also had one hit.

Jonathan Lucroy is making Einar Diaz look like Pudge Rodriguez.

I see Mike Napoli swing and miss when I close my eyes, his chant is now boos.

I haven't seen Adrian Beltre in weeks.

Jered Weaver looms tomorrow, his 79 MPH fastball geared up to strikeout a dozen Rangers.

These chucklefucks even broke Alex Claudio.

Austin Bibens-Dirkx no longer wants to be known as a big leaguer if this is what it's like.

This is everything I've never wanted but probably deserved.

Player of the Game: Shin-Soo Choo hit a home run.

Up Next: Jered Weaver is going to throw a shutout against the Rangers and A.J. Griffin but I'll be watching old episodes of Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego on YouTube instead. I think it's an early game. It's 2:40 pm CT. I looked it up. I care about you.