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A Theory About The New Motto.

#OneTexas Is Here.

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MLB: Texas Rangers at Los Angeles Angels Orlando Ramirez-USA TODAY Sports

The Texas Rangers have, as of this writing, unofficially unveiled their 2018 team motto. Skipper Jeff Banister was spotted wearing a black t-shirt emblazoned with the flag of the State of Texas and “ONE TEXAS” inscribed right below the flag. The Athletic DFW’s beat writer, Levi Weaver, captured this picture and it’s amazing. Or maybe I’m just mesmerized by Banny’s arms. Yeah, it’s Banny’s arms that have me mesmerized.

Naturally, this turn of events got me thinking. (this is the part where the LSB commenters groan)

I’ve seen tweet after tweet from Rangers fans bemoaning the #OneTexas motto. Fans were, and remain emotionally invested in the #NeverEverQuit motto and I honestly don’t blame them.

My theory: what if the #OneTexas motto is more than a new rallying cry for the 2018 campaign. What if the #OneTexas motto is a campaign to reunite the state of Texas with its long-lost sibling – Texas, New York?

That’s right, Texas, New York, an unincorporated community in Oswego County, New York and the State of Texas are long-lost siblings. Years ago, Texas (the state) and Texas (the community) were living together in harmony but a bad incident spurred Texas (the community) to pack up and hightail it to New York (the state). Are you with me? Good, let’s continue.

The community of Texas moved to Oswego County, New York to be part of a town named Mexico. This part of history has all been but forgotten. The modern-day Texas Rangers are here to make things right.

The Rangers are doing that thing in a 1980s movie where the good guy makes amends with his past before we see a montage of him training hard to beat the final big boss.

And the Rangers really need to train hard. They need to lift tree logs while standing in snow up to their knees. They need to hang upside down and do about 300 crunches while next to a roaring fire that turns the temperature in the room to a balmy 250 degrees.

They need to do all this training to be ready for the avalanche of Astros fans that will attack the #OneTexas motto.

Oh yeah, well at least #OneTexas team has won a World Series title!”, they’ll scream.

Sure. That’s true, Astros fans. But has your team moved heaven and earth to make amends and reunite with a long-lost sibling who bears the same name but is in New York? No? Well then, WHO’S THE BETTER TEAM NOW? Who has #TrueGrit?

A deep sigh. While I may have engaged in a bit of hyperbolic embellishment here, I think it’s better to ponder the reunification theory rather than face the inevitability that’s sure to come with this new motto:

#OneTexas is here. And it will #NeverEverQuit getting Rangers fans roasted by Astros fans.